Fear of bingeing, fear of the scale

This is getting out of hand.
After a particularly strenuous workout, I ate an entire roll of Hubba Bubba bubble gum. 180 calories.
And a few frozen grapes, and a glass of unsweetened watermelon juice. Maybe 400, 500 calories total today? And I feel like I've been binging non-stop. What is wrong with me? All I can think of is the scale. It HAS to be lower tomorrow. Or I'll step it up.
I can't have been trying hard enough or I would feel fainter, dizzier. At the moment the smell of banana bread wafts through the house, and I do feel like eating it, but I don't feel anywhere close to as weak as I should. ZERO calories tomorrow. Come what may. And I just hope the number on the scale keeps sinking.